Big mighty news is now. Don't know? That okay... I, Oog, will swing hairy arms and stomp with Oog's mighty legs, then maybe I learn you of new thing...
Strange noises I hear, it not monsters, it not ancestors, strange noise come from homos. I gesture the truth to you, I swear on the lives of my wives.
Huh? What is then? Why people do new noise? Guess what, Oog know...
Magic, invisible, understand-noise it be. Some homos make it up, it have no hand-symbol name though; it name is a sound, it called "talk". One homo make magic mouth noise and another homo across field get it and understand. NO MOVING, OOG SWEAR IT TRUTH!
It make Oog proud of every homo everywhere. Sometime, Oog lay amongst mammoth furs during moon-time but no sleep, for Oog imagine many suns and moons ahead about the homos Oog's children's children will have.
But, Oog stop and think sometime, even though it hurt head when Oog do. In many moons, will homos all use invisible mouth-magic? What will happen to wives and Oog's friends squatting around fire? Is good old day of gesture going away and never come back? Speared by invisible mouth-magic's arrowhead?
Oog is simple caveman just like you. Oog make baby with one wife at one time, Oog make candle with one ball of ear wax at one time, and if Oog need to communicate, then Oog get up, go over, and move Oog's body to explain like any normal homo do.
Oog have memory of Oog senior when he pass down art of charade to Oog. I, Oog, very proud of my skill. But what happen in many moon? Golden age of dance and fart to propose to new wife gone? What, will Oog now have make invisible mouth-noise just to get annoying children away? Oog hope not, Oog think backhand more fun on annoying children.
Oog notice more homos not communicate with gesture anymore. Homos everywhere no need now get up to explain. Now just sit in cave and yell at wives for saber-leg and baby making. Homos now lazy, forget the teachings of ancestors, and now high cholesterol. What next, Oog think... tool to talk to far off village?
Bah, Oog mad now. Too much new is bad thing. Homos need to forget new technology, it only distract, new is never the homo answer if want all survival! Stay with old way, the old way never change.
I like the concept! Develop it in the way I mentioned, as an Opinion or Thoughts section, if that sounds like something you'd like to do. Look into columnist Herb Cain. How comedians start everything with, "What's with ______? Does anyone else think _____ is strange?" That's not very clear, but I'm going to find something else to refer too.
ReplyDeleteQuestion: is this a caveman in caveman times discovering language? Not caveman in present time right?
Correct, it's a caveman in caveman times, which presents some difficulties but makes it more fun I guess.
ReplyDelete